Saturday, December 30
Valerian And The Movie Of A Thousand Hours
This is not a great film.
It's not a terrible film, though.
It's rather pretty. The script is dumb, but then The Fifth Element's script was extremely dumb and that was great.
The problems are the lead actor, who is dull as dishwater, and the utter lack of any sense of humour. Fifth Element excelled in both.
The action set-pieces are well done and the environments are great, but the moment it slows down you realise there is no there there.
If, like me, you are in the mood for something pretty and have a 99¢ Google Play movie rental handy, worth a shot, but otherwise entirely missable.
Also, nitpick, but - the City is seven hundred million miles from Earth? That's closer than Saturn. It's not much further away than Perth.
Update: Watched the last interminable forty minutes. The best part of the movie was Rihanna as the shape-changing alien dancer Bubble. She should have been the male lead. Seriously, that would have been an amazing film.
Posted by: Pixy Misa at
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"the utter lack of any sense of humour."
What are you talking about? The way the female lead kept calling her counterpart stupid was hilarious!
Posted by: Rick C at Saturday, December 30 2017 02:49 AM (h8yX6)
"Also, nitpick, but - the City is seven hundred million miles from Earth? That's closer than Saturn. It's not much further away than Perth."
I noticed that myself, but given that the City originated in Earth orbit and was moved away when it became a hazard to Earth itself, that kind of makes sense.
Posted by: Ed Hering at Saturday, December 30 2017 03:49 AM (h8yX6)
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