1 "Spoiler: There was no joy."

I get that, and I get why he's annoyed he was "forced" to upgrade:  his apps stopped working with his "out-of-date" version of iOS.  But then he started whining about how modern phones aren't built for ants.

2 Yeah, I felt that same "joy" recently as my long used LG V20 was giving me warnings about Android Auto imminently no longer working due to being outdated, and I depend on Waze and Google Maps.  I'd love to know how it would no longer work?  I haven't changed out my car any time recently and they don't update the firmware often or at all in cars.  So the car side of it would be static and the only way it would stop working would be if Google deliberately disabled it to force me to upgrade.  My V20 did everything I needed as well as I needed and worked like a champ with a battery change every 18 months or so (very simple to do as the V20 had a removable battery).  And then I got a new Android phone and saw how much more intrusive Google has gotten over the last 7 years.  Bleh.  Any sympathy I had for them in the past is long gone now and I feel the DoJ isn't going nearly far enough in their proposed breakup in the anti-trust suit.  Take a war hammer to them shatter them into itty bitty pieces.

3 "I'd love to know how it would no longer work?"
By order of Google/Apple.  Apps, when compiled, are marked with which versions of the OS they work with.  Both companies regularly update the earliest version their app stores will allow apps to support.  So when version X of the OS is no longer supported, you have to recompile your app to say it no longer supports that version.  Then, when your app is auto upgraded, boom, it stops working.