Oh, lovely, you're a cheery one aren't you?
Saturday, November 01
Griller Driller Edition
Top Story
- AMD has explained that when they said that drivers for their RX 5000 and RX 6000 graphics cards (and integrated graphics with the RDNA 1 and 2 architectures respectively) were entering maintenance mode with only bug fixes to be released and not optimisations for individual games, they didn't mean maintenance mode, they meant maintenance mode. (Tom's Hardware)
Everyone clear on that?
Good.
Long stupid story short, they will still be updating the drivers for related boards and APUs, just not promising to address the quirks of every game that comes along.
Also, the release note saying they were dropping support for the USB-C port on RX 7900 series boards was bullshit. Yes, it's in the official release notes; yes, it's officially bullshit.
The previous generation - the RX 400 and RX 500 series, which were the same thing with different numbers - is still kind of dead but we already knew that. You can still find new-in-box RX 580s but they're starting to dry up now. The XFX models I grabbed early this year are completely gone.
Update: Turns out my supplier found another four of them hiding somewhere. Priced around $100 including sales tax.
Tech News
- Some crazy person has created a version of Windows 7 that fits in just 69MB of disk space. (Tom's Hardware)
Considering that a decent SSD costs about 5c per GB, that's about 0.4c of space.
Also, it isn't actually useful for anything. It runs, but it doesn't run most software without you manually installing a bunch more system files.
- Those videos explaining how to bypass Windows 11's online account requirement during installation that YouTube has been merrily deleting? Blame AI. (The Register)
YouTube hasn't said anything, but when a video is taken down instantly, and an appeal is also rejected instantly, that's AI.
- YouTube was probably too busy to comment on the situation because the people at the top are occupied with laying off the people at the bottom to focus more heavily on the AI that is already destroying the site. (CNBC) (archive site)
Oh, good.
- Testing Highpoint's RocketAIC 7608AW. (Tom's Hardware)
This is a PCIe 5.0 card with a PCIe 5.0 switch chip on board and eight PCIe 5.0 M.2 slots. So it's fast, but it's also very expensive with the bare card priced at $1999.
The fault there seems to be mainly the PCIe 5.0 switch chip. There don't seem to be any products out there at a reasonable price.
The QNAP 4-port M.2 card that I have costs less than $200 on Amazon, but that's PCIe 3.0. Anything more recent will cost you an arm and a leg and a kidney and maybe a cornea.
- Israel demanded Amazon and Google use a secret "wink" code to sidestep legal orders. (The Guardian)
Warrant canaries. What these subliterate fascists are talking about are warrant canaries.
A warrant canary is a thing that appears to be normal until and unless the company receives a warrant with a gag order attached, the reasoning being that while gag orders are still legal, they can't compel you to keep your pet canary singing.
Particularly if they don't know you have a pet canary.
No fault attaches to Israel in this. All the blame attaches to the totalitarian regimes that necessitate this sort of warning mechanism.
And their pet media mouthpieces.
- When Canva bought Affinity in March last year, everyone wondered how long it would take them to fuck up a good and affordable multi-platform product range. It turns out the answer was 19 months. (Ars Technica)
Good news first: The whole Affinity product range is now free, bundled into a single application simply called Affinity.
Not really a problem news: To get the full functionality you need to pay $120 per year for a Canva subscription, but the only function gated behind the paywall right now is AI slop. The free version does everything the three Affinity apps could do before, except...
Problem news: Affinity v3 and read but not write Affinity v2 files. If you use the new app there's no going back, unless you re-export to a third-party format and lose internal history.
It could have been much worse, but they could also not have done this at all.
- A new mathematical proof debunks the idea that the universe is a simulation except it does nothing of the fucking sort. (Phys.org)
"It has been suggested that the universe could be simulated. If such a simulation were possible, the simulated universe could itself give rise to life, which in turn might create its own simulation. This recursive possibility makes it seem highly unlikely that our universe is the original one, rather than a simulation nested within another simulation," says Dr. Faizal. "This idea was once thought to lie beyond the reach of scientific inquiry. However, our recent research has demonstrated that it can, in fact, be scientifically addressed."
No it hasn't.The team demonstrated that even this information-based foundation cannot fully describe reality using computation alone. They used powerful mathematical theorems - including Gödel's incompleteness theorem-to prove that a complete and consistent description of everything requires what they call "non-algorithmic understanding."
Yes, that's cute. But we already have Gödel's incompleteness theorems (there's two of them) and this doesn't seem to tell us anything new at all - just a limit in the ability to determine the truth of certain mathematical statements.
The second problem, though, is that no-one has ever shown that "non-algorithmic understanding" exists, could possibly exist, or has any kind of clear definition.The team's conclusion is clear and marks an important scientific achievement, says Dr. Faizal.
There's just one small problem here: This is completely false.
"Any simulation is inherently algorithmic - it must follow programmed rules," he says.
- Speaking of every game that comes along Escape from Duckov, a combat game involving ducks written by a five-person team in China, has sold two million copies in two weeks, while western titles with budgets in the tens of millions of dollars continue to flounder.
Just a month ago, Megabonk, written by a one-man team, sold a million copies in two weeks... While western titles with budgets in the tens of millions of dollars continued to flounder.
And before that it was Silksong, written by three guys in Australia, selling 6 million copies, and before that it was Schedule 1, written by just one guy in Australia, selling 5 million copies.
It starts to feel like the established video game companies are doing something wrong.
-
Meanwhile Nintendo's patent on capturing monsters and putting them in your pocket, which the company planned to use as a legal bludgeon against Palworld, a game where you capture monsters and put them in your pocket, has been rejected by the Japanese patent office for being "boring and stupid". (MSN)
Actually they just said the patent lacked originality, which of course it fucking does because Nintendo waited thirty years before trying to patent it.
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Friday, October 31
Octember's Baby Edition
Top Story
- Sorry, doomsayers. The trade war and crippling rare earth element shortages have been pushed back to 2026. (Tom's Hardware)
And the US had already forged agreements to obtain rare earth elements from other sources.
Always doom tomorrow, never doom today.
Tech News
- AMD is relegating driver support for the RX 5000 and RX 6000 series cards to maintenance mode. (Tom's Hardware)
They'll still receive bugfixes, but not driver updates to tune performance in specific games.
My RX 7800 XT is still covered for now. My two RX 580s rather less so; those drivers have been in maintenance mode for long enough that it's not clear there is still maintenance going on.
- CISA and NSA share tips on securing Microsoft Exchange servers. (Bleeping Computer)
If these tips don't involve thermite, I'm not interested.
- Google is - reluctantly and with much kicking and screaming - starting to implement the changes required from its catastrophic loss in the suit brough against it by Epic Games. (Ars Technica)
A catastrophe for Google. A strawberry sundae for everyone else.
- Slop, slop everywhere, and the message boards did stink. (The Verge)
Facebook's answer to protests against the increasing amount of AI slop in its products is more slop.
- AI browsers are a security time bomb. (The Verge) (archive site)
There is no upside here. AI browsers are bad news.
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Thursday, October 30
Adge Edition
Top Story
- Microsoft went down. (The Verge)
The outage took out Azure, Microsoft 365, Xbox services, and most importantly, Minecraft, as well as a whole string of Azure customers like Starbucks, Costco, and Zoom. It even affected some services on AWS and Google Cloud.
It was DNS.
It is always DNS.
Tech News
- Microsoft keeps disabling workarounds for Windows 11's demand for an online account during setup.
Now Microsoft has YouTube playing cleanup for it, removing videos instructing people how to use the remaining workarounds. (Tom's Hardware)
Because fuck you, that's why.
- The problem with Windows handhelds is Windows. (The Verge) (archive site)
I knew it!
- Two-time Intel CEO Pat Gelsinger is now at Gloo, where he is working on an AI that will... Accelerate the Second Coming? (The Guardian)
Look, it's The Guardian, so take that with a pillar of salt, but I'm not sure this would be entirely a good thing.
- Bending Spoons is buying AOL for $1.5 billion. (Axios)
We will always have the free coasters though.
- Grokipedia apparently contains insufficient leftist propaganda to satisfy the insufferable moral cretins at The Verge. (The Verge)
That's a promising sign, at least.
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Wednesday, October 29
Aoi Sora Edition
Top Story
- Amazon is cutting 14,000 corporate jobs. (The Verge)
Not replacing them with AI. Just... Not replacing them.
- Apple and Microsoft have both passed the $4 trillion market cap line. (Tech Crunch)
Joining Nvidia among the most valuable companies in the world.
Google's parent company is valued at $3.25 trillion, and Amazon is at $2.42 trillion.
Google's parent company Alphabet is valued at $3.25 trillion, Amazon is at $2.42 trillion, and Facebook's parent Meta is at $1.89 trillion.
Tech News
- How to watch the GTC 2025 keynote. (Tom's Hardware)
What's GTC? This is mentioned nowhere in the article.
- How to watch the fake AI generated crypto scam GTC 2025 keynote. (Tom's Hardware)
Still no mention of what GTC actually is.
- OpenAI's ChatGPT-based web browser, Atlas is... Not a web browser. At all. (Anil Dash)
It queries ChatGPT and assembles things that look like web pages, but have no provenance and no links.
There's nothing to click on. You type your queries into ChatGPT and you wait for it to generate your slop.
- The Python Foundation has rejected a $1.5 million government grant due to the strings attached. (The Register)
The "strings" were don't be racist.
For some reason the Python Foundation found that requirement a bridge too far.
- The US Senate is hard at work... On a bill that would ban AI tamagotchis for children. (NBC)
Priorities, people.
- OpenAI wants to get to a $1 trillion per year infrastructure spend. (Axios)
Same.
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Tuesday, October 28
Over Pressure Edition
Top Story
- The Department of Energy has signed a $1 billion deal - of some sort - with AMD to build two new supercomputers for energy and medical research. (Tom's Hardware)
The systems - one to be delivered early next year, the second in 2028 - use AMD's Epyc CPUs and Instinct accelerator cards. Instinct is marketed mostly towards AI now, because that's where the money is, but it's a general purpose card for crunching lots of numbers very quickly and makes a fine building block for a supercomputer.
- Qualcomm meanwhile is chasing the trillion dollar bubble with its AI200 and AI250 accelerator cards. (Tom's Hardware)
The two cards are expected to arrive next year and 2027 respectively. Since these are new devices and don't have the track record of Nvidia or AMD (or even Intel) it's hard to know how well they will compete, but Qualcomm did announce that the cards will have 768GB of LPDDR memory each.
These are strongly oriented towards low-precision calculations and would not be as useful for a non-AI supercomputer, or for playing Minecraft.
Tech News
- The M5 MacBook Pro's SSD is 2.5x faster than the one used in the M4 models. (Tom's Hardware)
It can achieve... 6000MBps.
Which is pretty fast, yes, but all but the cheapest M.2 SSDs can achieve that now, and Apple's storage prices are anything but cheap.
And it means the M4 model only delivered 2400MBps, which if accurate is not fast at all.
- There's no point in waiting for the M5 MacBook Air. (WCCFTech)
Unless you want a fast SSD.
- Ultra HD televisions are not noticeably better for watching television, maybe. (The Guardian)
The researchers working on this study note that human vision (naturally good or properly corrected) is about 50% better than the common measure of 20/20 because Herman Snellen - who created the familiar eye chart - needed glasses.
They also created a handy calculator that lets you put in your display details and see how good it is for your use.
For example, my laptop's 2880x1620 screen shows that 66% of people with good vision could tell the difference between it and a "perfect" display. By the time you get to a 4k laptop screen, that drops to 1%.
And for common 27" or 32" monitors, something between 5k and 8k qualifies as close enough to perfect. (96% of people can actually see the pixels of a 4k desktop monitor at normal viewing distances, but if you replace it with an 8k model that drops to just 1%.)
- Ex-CISA head Jen Easterly thinks AI might fix code so fast we won't need security teams. (The Register)
We can be thankful that this idiot no longer holds her role at CISA.
- CEO of Alphabet’s X, Astro Teller, on what makes a moonshot. (Tech Crunch) (archive site)
What?
- Here's what ads will look like on your $2000 Samsung smart fridge. (The Verge) (archive site)
Somehow I paid a quarter of that and didn't get any ads.
Anime Update
- Tojima Wants to Be a Kamen Rider: Tanzaburo Tojima wants to be a Kamen Rider. Only problem is, he's now 40, and has to make do with beating the crap out of random bears. But when criminals show up cosplaying as thugs from the Kamen Rider goon squad "Shocker", he finally gets his chance to live out his dream.
And then things get weird.
- Sanda: Japan in the future is in decline and the latest generation of children only numbers around 50,000. Who can save a nation's faltering dream? No idea, honest.
Things start off weird and get weirder.
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Monday, October 27
Scrambled Edition
Top Story
- Why open source may not survive the rise of generative AI. (ZDNet)
Actually a real concern.
Open source depends on copyright. If you write something - software, here, but anything - it is your creating and you have the right to sell it, or to give it away, on terms you decide. Large open source projects need to get permission from all their contributors to include their code in their project.
Generative AI trashes all of that. The products of generative AI are not generally copyrightable, and they don't keep track of where things came from either. A piece of code from AI could be nominally original, or it could be adapted from an open source project, or it could be copied verbatim from a copyrighted source that the AI might not even have had legal access to (Anthropic had to pay out $1.5 billion over similar problems with its training data).
And you can't tell.
Tech News
- Federal regulators have denied autonomous trucking company Aurora Innovation an exemption to safety rules requiring signals to be placed around broken down vehicles. (Reason)
Aurora Innovation has sued the Department of Transportation for... Not changing the rules in its favour.
- GM plans to drop Apple CarPlay and Android Auto support on new vehicles and replace them with, you guessed it, more AI slop. (The Verge)
Specifically based on Google Gemini, though I don't think the particular flavour of slop is of primary concern.
- Why are network devices in 2025 still vulnerable to the kind of exploits we saw in 1995? (CSO Online)
Not the specific exploits, but buffer overruns, remote code execution, or simple authentication bypasses where the code never checks the password at all.
The answer? Because we're still dealing with code that was likely written in 1995:"But when you're dealing with legacy code - we've actually seen some C++ applications where you have literally thousands of overflow issues and the original developers are long gone - it's very difficult to get a new developer to look at it, and they don't really want to touch the code. They get to a point where it's like: Well, prove to me it's exploitable, because this is a critical old piece of code that no one understands and it's dangerous to touch it."
The solution?
Throw AI at it, and when it breaks, fire people.
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Sunday, October 26
Clue Edition
Top Story
- Clippy in the server room with a portable blender: Microsoft hopes Mico succeeds where Clippy failed as tech companies warily imbue AI with personality. (AP News)
Mico is the new horrifying AI-driven mascot of Microsoft's inescapable AI-driven offense to reason, Copilot.
Mico is... A grape? A purple raspberry? I don't know exactly, but kill it with fire."When you talk about something sad, you can see Mico's face change. You can see it dance around and move as it gets excited with you," said Jacob Andreou, corporate vice president of product and growth for Microsoft AI, in an interview with The Associated Press. It’s in this effort of really landing this AI companion that you can really feel."
I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit.Tech-savvy adopters of advanced AI coding tools may want it to "act much more like a machine because at the back end they know it’s a machine," Reimer said. "But individuals who are not as trustful in a machine are going to be best supported - not replaced - by technology that feels a little more like a human."
"We glued artificial fur to our woodchipper so that you will feel comfortable as we feed you into it."
Tech News
- The ones who walk away from AImelas. (MSN)
Could you live in a perfect utopia if it depended on one AI developer somewhere not getting his acai smoothie in the morning?
Wait, I don't think that analogy quite works. The original story didn't hold up well to second thoughts either, so maybe it metaworks.
- A Baltimore high school student was handcuffed and searched by police after an AI-equipped camera mistook a bag of Doritos for a firearm. (The Guardian)
Everything dumb is still dumb when you add AI, just faster.
- The Great SassS Gaslighting. (Unworkable Ideas)
There's a reason IBM rented its software from the early days, and it was not to save you money.
- Why these companies insist on a 72 hour work week. (MSN)
Because you are expendable. You're barely even a consideration.
- Electronic Arts is partnering with the company behind Stable Diffusion to make games with AI and not in the good way. (Engadget)
Computer games have been using AI for about as long as there have been computer games. Well, not the original Pong which also technically wasn't a computer game since it ran directly on TTL logic and didn't use any sort of processor. While I was looking into that I ran into this cool tidbit on the original Pong prototype:A few days later, the prototype began exhibiting technical issues and Gaddis contacted Alcorn to fix it. Upon inspecting the machine, Alcorn discovered that the problem was due to the coin mechanism overflowing with quarters.
Nice problem to have.
Oh, anyway, AI has had a role in computer games for about 50 years, but EA aren't planning to use AI in the game. They're planning to use AI to create the game.
- The glaring security risks with AI browser agents. (Tech Crunch)
So, AI browsers are the big new thing. You hand over your ID and your credit cards and they can find the best deal for you online, which is much the same idea as giving your wallet, car keys, and a bottle of Everclear to a nine-year-old with severe ADHD.
Or to put it differently, an 88 year old politician in the early stages of dementia.
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Saturday, October 25
Megalosaurus Edition
Top Story
- Tech companies have maxed out their credit cards in wild pursuit of the AI let's-not-call-it-a-bubble. (Notebook Check)
Debt held by those companies has increased fourfold over the past ten years, to a total of $1.35 trillion.
If the bubble bursts abruptly, the most highly leveraged of those companies - and their lenders - are going to be in a world of pain.
As is the economy, meaning everyone who didn't borrow all that money and set in on fire chasing phantasms.
Tech News
- It's Ruperts all the way down until it isn't: The first shape has been found that doesn't have the Rupert property. (Quanta)
The Rupert property means that an object with a given 3D shape can pass through a hole bored through another object the same size and shape, but rotated so that the smallest cross section of one shape passes through the largest cross section of the other.
The first shape - or at least the first convex polyhedron - has been found that does not have this property.
Or rather, the second, though the article doesn't not point this out presumably because the original example is considered a degenerate solution: Spheres have the same cross-section from every angle, and therefore can only pass through a hole exactly that size.
- Iceland found its first mosquito. (CNN)
Keep looking, guys, I'm sure you can find more.
- Microsoft Teams will start tracking your location and reporting you to your boss. (Tom's Guide)
That seems a little goldfish-bowlish, but still. If you're getting paid to be in the office, and you're not in the office, and your boss finds out, that is rather on you, isn't it?
- Rivian will pay $250 million to settle a lawsuit over major price increases on its cars. (Tech Crunch)
Wait, Rivian makes cars?
Anyway, Rivian hiked prices by 20% to cover increasing costs, and shareholders immediately sued claiming reasonably enough that Rivian had misrepresented those costs.
- Automattic has filed a countersuit against WP Engine, claiming trademark abuse. (TechCrunch)
WP Engine fired back, saying it merely referred to WordPress by name, adding that Matt Mullenweg's parents are very disappointed in him and he never calls except when he needs money.
- The Espresso Pro is an overpriced 15.6" 4k monitor aimed at Mac users. (The Verge) (archive site)
When even tech journalists think your price is too high, your price is too high.
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Friday, October 24
Everything Edition
Top Story
- Apple has lost a lawsuit in the UK alleging it overcharged commissions payable by developers, who passed half the excess cost on to their customers, which, this being Apple, was charged by Apple who then took their cut on it. (9to5Mac)
Penalties could amount to $2 billion.
- In other "that used to be a lot" news Anthropic has signed a deal with Google for cloud services said to be in the tens of billions of dollars. (CNBC)
Amazon, which has invested $8 billion in Anthropic, might be asking some questions at this point.
Tech News
- Elon Musk claims Tesla's new AI5 chip is 40x more performant than previous-gen AI4. (Tom's Hardware)
We hates that word. We hates it, precious.
- Fujitsu's new FMV Note A laptop has a Ryzen 7 7735U CPU - one step up from what I am typing this on - and a Blu-Ray drive. (Tom's Hardware)
With BDXL support too, for 100GB rewriteable discs.
- The Radeon AI Pro 9700 launches Monday at a price of $1299. (WCCFTech)
It's a Radeon 9070 XT with twice as much memory. At twice the price.
- A look at the Microtik CRS812-8DS-2DQ-2DDQ-RM (Serve the Home)
Otherwise known as Tim.
Tim is an Ethernet switch with two 400Gb ports, two 200Gb ports, and eight 50Gb ports. It also has two 10Gb ports but it turns out they're just for management and aren't part of the switching logic. And hot swap fans and redundant power supplies.
Since all the ports use the same signalling, internally it uses a 32-port 50Gb switch, with 4 ports assigned to each 200Gb connector and 8 assigned to each 400Gb connector, and you can break them out again with an octopus cable.
Tim costs $1295, which is pretty reasonable considering what he brings to the table.
- Serverless is a handicap. (Viduli)
It also costs several times more than just having a server.
Welcome to the Internet, here's your monthly bill. Don't worry about paying, we've put a lien on your will.
- Microsoft has updated the Windows file explorer so that it doesn't display previews of files downloaded from the internet - again - because its security model is still dogshit after all these years. (Bleeping Computer)
Welcome to the Internet, you've been compromised. Everything is infinitely worse than you surmised.
- "Analog bags" are in. Doomscrolling is out. (Axios) (archive site)
What the hell is an "analog bag", you ask.
An analog bag is... A book bag.How it works: "I basically just put everything I could grab for instead of my phone into a bag," including knitting, a scrapbook and a Polaroid camera, says Sierra Campbell, the content creator behind the trend.
Okay, that sounds healthy enough. What's the harm?
The harm is that everyone who owns one is insane:The 31-year-old keeps one bag at home in Northern California, carrying it from room to room, and another in her car.
But that's just one person."It speaks to an incredible desperation and desire for experiences that return our attention to us, that fight brain-rotting, that are tactile… that involve creating over scrolling," Beth McGroarty, vice president of research at the Global Wellness Institute, tells Axios.
Welcome to the Internet, fuck this shit I'm out. You can sit there in the corner and count your ill-earned clout.
Musical Interlude
Song is Welcome to the Internet by Bo Burnham. Animation is basically a celebration of vtuber agency Phase Connect - that fish dude is the avatar of CEO Sakana - which has been going from strength to strength as competitors have been folding or failing or being exposed as lying stealing cheating frauds looking at you Vshojo.
Phase Connect will be revealing five new talents this weekend as part of its fourth generation, Phase Saga. The sixth member, Anya Nyabyss (now which recently-retired Phase-affiliated indie vtuber could that possibly be?) has postponed her debut until some non-specific personal circumstances clear up.
The "nine year old who died" in the video (it's part of the original song) is a reference to Amaris Yuri, who came over from Cyberlive when they folded along with Kaneko Lumi, and then became the only talent ever to be fired by Phase Connect.
She's back with her channel intact and will be redebuting as an indie soon.
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Thursday, October 23
Tea And Sandwiches Edition
Top Story
- A statement on superintelligence. (Superintelligence Statement)
These people are idiots. Or at least, suffering from an epidemic of Engineer's Disease.
If you outlaw AI that actually works, only outlaws will have AI that actually works.
And nobody is working in superintelligent AI because nobody is working on intelligent AI.
- Meta is laying off 600 people from its AI team. (CNBC) (archive site)
Certainly not those guys.
Tech News
- Will the $4500 price tag put people off Rivian's electric bicycle. (The Verge) (archive site)
(shake shake) Signs point to yes.
- Ring's CEO says his cameras could "almost zero out crime" within the next twelve months. (The Verge) (archive site)
I think that in most normal, average neighborhoods, with the right amount of technology - not too crazy - and with AI, that we can get very close to zero out crime.
Forward the Panopticon.
- Old-fashioned reliable IT systems - mostly COBOL - saved US states around $40 billion in nine months in 2020. (Financial Times)
The article comes to the opposite conclusion.
The article is written by an idiot.
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