Sunday, December 28
They didn't have any Tropical Frosty Fruits when I went to the supermarket to pick up the bread mix on Christmas Eve. All of the stores always run out of Tropical Frosty Fruits whenever the weather gets warm. Always. You'd think that after a few years they'd realise that if they had more Tropical Frosty Fruits in stock, they could sell more Tropical Frosty Fruits, but no, not Coles, not Woolworths, not even the little IGA.
I got some Bulla mixed flavour - what's a location-neutral term for these? It says on the box "Frozen Fruit Juice Water Ice", which will do, I suppose. I got some Bulla Fruity Licious Frozen Fruit Juice Water Ices, which come in Orange, Tropical (which means "Orange and Pineapple and sometimes Passionfruit but in this case just Orange and Pineapple") and Apple and Blackcurrant. As I expected (having bought Bulla products in the past), they taste of... Nothing much. 40% fruit juice with 4% of the flavour! No taste, less fattening!
I also got some Orange and Cranberry Frosty Fruits. Unlike the Bulla Fruity Licious Frozen Fruit Juice Water Ices* these do have flavour: Horrible.
You can suck off the orange outer shell, but you'd better stop before you hit the red part. Whose idea was it to make these things? What planet are they from? I used to have Turkey Torpedoes at the Dymocks Cafe in Sydney, with turkey breast and camembert and cranberry sauce, and that was okay, since they gave you the cranberry sauce in a little dish and you could apply as much or as little of it as you wished. It's an interesting offset to the turkey and the camembert, though I think that strawberry jam would have worked as well if not better.
But frozen cranberry juice? I mean yes, there are people in the world who drink their own urine, but that would seem to me a rather limited market segment. The only thing I can think of is that the makers (Peters) have realised just how clueless the supermarkets are, and are producing additional revolting flavours cheaply, knowing that people will try them when the weather hits the billion degrees mark and all the stores are out of those yummy Tropical Frosty Fruits a-bloody-gain. And that they (Peters) trust that people will blame the idiots at the supermarkets for all of this.
Hmm. I think it's working.
Also, while I'm complaining, why the heck did Lean Cuisine take their Oriental Beef dinner off the market? Some of their other dinners are sort-of-okay-I-guess; the chicken in mustard sauce, for example. The Chicken Marsala was great before they replaced the snow peas and baby carrots with non-snow peas and carrot sticks to save a few cents.
But the Oriental Beef was wonderful. I'm not sure exactly what went into the sauce, but whatever it was, worked. Not overpowering, not specifically black bean or anything else. Wafer-thin slices of Australian beef. Fluffy white rice. I used to have it sometimes twice a week. And when I say twice a week, that means I bought four of them, because the primary reason these dinners aren't fattening is that they're too damn small - roughly half a pound, in this case.
Damn you, supermarkets! Damn you, Lean Cuisine!
The only thing consistently better than the Lean Cuisine Oriental Beef - apart from eating out - is my own cooking**, something I haven't done for too long. I didn't even do my seven-day lamb stew this winter.*** But job number two really is winding down now, so if no more computers explode, then someday soon I will actually cook myself something.
In the meantime, my schedule is as follows:
Tomorrow (Sunday): Sleep
Tuesday: Avoid work as much as possible
Wednesday: Avoid work as much as possible, then leave early
Thursday: Play with nephews
Friday: Work frantically because I have a deadline on Monday
Yep, looks like a good week.
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