A cricket bat!
Twelve years, and four psychiatrists!
Four?
I kept biting them!
Why?
They said you weren't real.

A Tiger? In Africa?

Those struggling to distinguish the small alpine country in Europe from Australia were dealt a blow when a kangaroo was hit by a car and killed in central Austria.

Skippy! Noooo!!

A police officer in Steyr reached by phone said that coming across a kangaroo - dead or alive - was "extremely uncommon around here."

No kidding.

(source: Yahoo News via The Wall Street Journal)

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Mice? Mice? Don't Talk To Me About Mice!

From the You Can't Make This Stuff Up Department: Oklahoma City seizes 30,000 mice

Oklahoma City police succeeded in busting an illegal rodent farm but now authorities are faced with the problem of what to do with 30,000 white mice seized in the raid.

That is, I presume, as opposed to a legal rodent farm?

"We have completely emptied our truck port where the vehicles come in and have it totally filled with mice. We don't know what to do with them. They are sitting and waiting," Lira said.

Well, if they're only sitting and waiting, you don't have a problem. It's when they start - you know - that you have a problem.

"He told us he wanted out of the mouse business," Lira said.

Should've called Disney.

(Yeah, yeah, via Dave Barry)

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