Dear Santa, thank you for the dolls and pencils and the fish. It's Easter now, so I hope I didn't wake you but... honest, it is an emergency. There's a crack in my wall. Aunt Sharon says it's just an ordinary crack, but I know its not cause at night there's voices so... please please can you send someone to fix it? Or a policeman, or...
Back in a moment.
Thank you Santa.
Back in a moment.
Thank you Santa.
Saturday, December 30
Valerian And The Movie Of A Thousand Hours
This is not a great film.
This is not a great film.
It's not a terrible film, though.
It's rather pretty. The script is dumb, but then The Fifth Element's script was extremely dumb and that was great.
The problems are the lead actor, who is dull as dishwater, and the utter lack of any sense of humour. Fifth Element excelled in both.
The action set-pieces are well done and the environments are great, but the moment it slows down you realise there is no there there.
If, like me, you are in the mood for something pretty and have a 99¢ Google Play movie rental handy, worth a shot, but otherwise entirely missable.
Also, nitpick, but - the City is seven hundred million miles from Earth? That's closer than Saturn. It's not much further away than Perth.
Update: Watched the last interminable forty minutes. The best part of the movie was Rihanna as the shape-changing alien dancer Bubble. She should have been the male lead. Seriously, that would have been an amazing film.
Posted by: Pixy Misa at
01:15 AM
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